Self-Compassion Is Also a Swift Kick in the Ass

Yes, you read that right. I don’t mean to say ‘beat yourself up’, but I bet you’d like to beat that part of you that keeps you down. You know, the one that would prefer to shy away from difficulties and discomfort. The one that puts things off to tomorrow.

Psychotherapists love to talk about self-compassion. It is important. It certainly beats self-loathing. But here’s my contention: self-compassion should spur action. Without it, changing your self-talk is just changing the channel while remaining on the couch.

Self-compassion is not merely to accept yourself as you are, it is also to embrace the potential of who you could become. It is not to coddle your inner child, but to nurture its growth.

Yes, you need to love yourself. But what is that self exactly?

Is it merely the sum of our habits and roles? Ask anyone struggling with addiction. Is this ‘addict’ really who you are? If it were so, how could recovery be possible?

Love yourself enough to forgive yourself, and love yourself enough to push yourself to change.

Rendered another way, self-compassion is to hate the sin, not the sinner. Repent, you can do better.

Relapse? Relax, but don’t let your guard down. Renew your intention and begin again.

We’re not meant to be perfect, nor should we settle for mediocrity.

Self-compassion is more than accepting your flaws. It’s also working to address them.

In the past few years, I’ve gotten more serious about running. It’s meant keeping to a routine, even if I haven’t always felt like it. It’s meant setting targets and embracing the inevitable pain of pushing past my comfort zone to reach them. It’s meant adjusting priorities to create opportunities for training. But above all else, it’s been rewarding.

Self-compassion was the swift kick in the ass I needed to get out of bed on a Sunday morning.

You’ve got to love yourself enough to push yourself to change.

It’s not too late. You’re right on time.

Yours truly after the Ottawa half-marathon.

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